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Going The Distance - How to Survive Being Miles Apart

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You are here: HomeblogGoing The Distance - How to Survive Being Miles Apart
Going The Distance - How to Survive Being Miles Apart

Dear Lynda

My partner and I have been together for nearly 2 years and I have just been offered a job in Dubai. It’s a very good opportunity and my partner is supportive but we are both worried about managing a long distance relationship.

Long distance relationships are tough and require effort.  There will be times when you both feel lonely and fed up and, not being there for particular events or when life isn’t going well, can be a real challenge.  However, there are a number of practical things you can do to make it easier:

Communicate Regularly – experiment with different types of communication, email, instant messenger, text and try to fit in some video chats such as Skype or Face Time. Not all conversations have to be long or intense but ongoing chat keeps the relationship going and will help each of you to feel connected and loved.  This is especially important if you can’t visit very often.  Keep each other up to date with what’s going on in your day, send pics or audio clips from time to time.

Commitment – to make a long distanced relationship work you both have to be 100% committed to the relationship.  Having an open, honest discussion about your ideas and wishes for the future are very important.  Do you see yourselves getting married in the future or spending the rest of your lives together?  Make sure you both want the same things.

Make Plans – plan when you are going to see each other, talk about how long you will spend apart and work together to come up with an end goal.  Will this be for a year or more, would your partner willing to relocate?  Making plans, writing them down and sharing them with each other can be helpful.  In times of doubt and uncertainty, it can help you stay on track.

Here are a few other things to consider:

  • trust is essential
  • accepting your roller coaster feelings will make it easier
  • consider the time zones and know each other’s schedules so you’re not messaging at awkward moments or in the middle of the night
  • have fun and enjoy the romance

You will experience difficult times but many couples survive and thrive a long distance relationship.

All the best.